utorak, 8. siječnja 2013.

Enver Krivac u Relacijama

Preveo se. Prodao se. Da je barem za neke skupe novce. Nego za slavu. Ili čak ni to. Za ništa.

Časopis Relations, priča Prva večera.

Kome se ne da tražiti časopis, a ni čitati na engleskom evo autora glasom i stasom na hrvatskom:

Broj komentara: 7:

  1. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TylvUGJIi_w

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  2. wow koji aplauz! od minute! thnx, bender! :))

    evo ako nekog zanima dotična priča. prevoditelj je tomislav kuzmanović.

    The house Adam and Eve lived in was the first and the last in the only street, so Jehovah had no trouble finding it. He knocked and Eve opened the door. Good evening, woman, Jehovah said. A good couple from this neighborhood invited me for supper, am I at a right address? Eve smiled and showed him the sign at the door which said: Firsty-Ony.

    In the house, Adam welcomed him with his arms wide open and shook his hand firmly. After they’d downed a glass or two, all three of them sat down on the floor of the only room in the house. Why don’t you build yourself a dining room to entertain your guests? Jehovah asked. I have no guests to entertain, Adam answered. The other day, when we were coming back after naming all the plants and animals, we thought we saw two pairs of footprints, but then it turned out that we’d left them before and then once before that. Is there a chance that these were not our footsteps after all and that you have created someone else, but you forgot to tell us? asked Adam jokingly, but he was serious. Jehovah shook his head several times and shrugged his shoulders.

    Soon the supper was over. Eve invited them to sit at the table filled with all kinds of foods. Three, four… Five courses, woman, said Jehovah amazed. Ah, I just made some, so that it’s there, better there’s too much than that there’s not enough, and Adam too, well, he loves his plate full to the brim and more, and we we’re having guests… Eve answered. Compliments then to the cook, said Jehovah. Man, you have a good woman. She got everything she knows about cooking from me, Adam said, tapped his ribs and asked, So, how is it? Jehovah answered, his mouth full, Excellent, I’d only add a little salt, but, woman, don’t be angry, I put salt in manna too. The seraphim always reproach me for it, they say I should be careful about the three white killers: sugar, salt and flour. Salt, Eva asked confused. Forgive me, my lord, but what is salt? That thing you collect from rocks by the shore, what you put in soup and casseroles, the white lumps, Jehovah said. Didn’t we agree to call it salt? Ahhh, the cock, Adam shouted and turned to Eve. The lord means cock! What did you say, salt? All right, from now on we too will call it salt. Whatever our lord wishes, Eve adds. You don’t exactly have to call it salt, ok, Jehovah said, just don’t call it cock anymore. Didn’t we agree that that’s the word for the little rooster? Yes, we did, Eve answered. But, Adam and I sometimes change the name for something three times in a week. For fun, so that we don’t get bored. And we prefer to call the little rooster the little rooster. This thing that something or someone can have two words in a name, that’s our last great discovery. But if we had someone else in the garden with us, we wouldn’t change the names so often. Jehovah answered with his mouth full, I understand you, woman, but I have a feeling that you called me to this dinner to lobby, to talk me into things. And I told you nicely a couple of years ago when first time you asked me. Adam dropped the wooden spoon from his hand and pinched the root of his nose: You don’t understand, my lord. You have a whole choir up there, so many messengers work for your that you have the luxury of firing those who oppose you, so many messengers, my lord, and for whom when they have only my swift Eve and me to bring us messages from you? And we’re here alone like that tree in the center down there.

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  3. Man and woman, I didn’t come here to argue, my word is the law, my word was in the beginning. Where was your word in the beginning? For now the two of you are enough for me. You are so impatient, and you’re my favorite creations! The salt of the Earth! The cock of the Earth, said Eve, and Jehovah just glared at her. Again, my lord, you don’t understand, said Adam. Before it meant salt, the cock was our name for the deer. Before that, for the wheat, and even before that we used it for that thing when it clears up after rain, and the quequette gets really clean. Quequette, that’s what we used to call pliquette once, but now we call it air, Eve explained. Jehovah nodded. Yes, but before we called that thing when it clears up after rain, Adam went on, the cock was the word for the two of us. We agreed that you’d call yourselves people, Jehovah said. Yes, we did, Eve said, but when we’re alone, we’re a cock.

    Listen, said Jehovah and got to his feet. First of all, from now on I ask you to stick to the names of all things living or dead as we agreed and to leave them the way you first reported them at the Eden’s cherub notary office. Second, learn to live alone. And third, has the good wife perhaps made some desert? Adam and Eve glanced at each other. What was that? Jehovah asked. Nothing, said Eve and got up from the table. She came back right away with a huge plate of pie. We each get a piece, Eve said, and our lord gets the biggest one. When he finished the piece, Jehovah thanked them for treating him so well and asked what the pie was made of since it was so tasty. Apple, said Adam. Apple, great, which kind did you use, the Golden Delicious from Halilah, Jehovah asked, or the Jonathan from the Land of Cush? I don’t know, woman, if you saw what Granny Smiths I planted on the banks of Euphrates? No, Eve replied. We used the local sort. Jehovah went pale in a second. He got up from the table and coughed loudly which made the whole house shake. No, you didn’t, he yelled appalled and disturbingly pale. When you don’t want to hear us, my lord, said Adam. You listen, but don’t hear. Perhaps now, after you’ve eaten from the tree you yourself had banned, perhaps now you’ll hear. Jehovah doubled over, fell to his knees, vomited his heart out and screamed – Traitors! – so loud that the walls cracked. Then two cherubs with flaming swords burst into the house at Firsty-Ony and, in an impressive display of aggression and magnificence, dragged Jehovah out of the house.

    You can’t do this to me! What are you doing?! Stop! I order you! I set the rules here, he shouted as they took him east. I’ll never survive outside the garden! Bastards! His screams did not make it to the ears of the angels that kept on dragging him faster and faster.

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    1. Ajde da prevedenu priču staviš u post, a ne komentar :)

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    2. thnx al šta sad, ne bi zatrpavao. a i evo već je tu. a ima i par felera jer je to verzija koju sam dobio tamo u pazinu. vjerujem/nadam se da su to popravili do časopisa. ajde ti radije stavi svoj txt o glavnom neprijateljskom gradu hrvatske. :)

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